CUTAWAYS: SPINAL TAP (DELETED SCENE)

In these days of on demand movie streaming, there’s not a lot of reason to actually buy DVDs anymore. That’s why extras like commentary tracks and behind the scenes documentaries have become such important marketing tools for film companies. And sometimes, the extras are more than worth the cost of the disc. Take for example the deleted scenes from Spinal Tap like this one…

Now why am I bringing up DVD extras. Well, it actually starts with The Happy Catholic. You see, for all my efforts at plugging her book, Julie D. has decided to reward me by… giving me some work to do.

Nah, it’s not really work. It’s only the Why Do I Love Jesus meme, which asks for those who are tagged to share 5 things they “love” about Jesus/or why they love Jesus. As fate would have it, this is actually a meme I got tagged with by dadwithnoisykids way back in the first year of this blog when only a handful of people had yet to find their way here. And in an appropriate coincidence, what with Julie being the queen of quotes and all, my answers came in the form of movie quotations. It went something like this.

As my close friends already know, and what those who visit here shouldn't be surprised by, is that I can rarely make it through a single sentence without a movie reference. So with that it mind, here are my 5 Things I Love About Jesus.

(1) "Have you found Jesus yet Gump?" "I didn't know I was supposed to be looking for him sir." - Forrest Gump

I was not raised a Christian (or anything else for that matter). I can count on my fingers the number of times I attended a church service during my pre-adolescent days. But once I finally went looking for God, imagine my surprise to find out that He had been there all along, close by, laying the groundwork for our first official face-to-face meeting. And he did the same thing for each and every member of my family in there own due time. I love Jesus because He's always there, whether we know it or not.

(2) “Dear Lord baby Jesus, we thank you so much for this bountiful harvest of Dominos, KFC, and the always delicious Taco Bell. I just want to take time to say thank you for my family. My two sons, Walker, and Texas Ranger, or TR as we call him. And of course my red hot smokin' wife Carley, who is a stone cold fox." - Talladega Nights

In middle school, when I finally became a Christian and started my journey into the Church, my beginners prayers were not what you would call eloquent. It went something like, "Thank you Lord, for everything." I still trot that old prayer out every now and then, although it has a much deeper meaning to me these days as I've come to understand that "everything" doesn't just include the good stuff I've been given. I love Jesus for teaching me to be thankful for everything.

(3) "O God, ease our suffering in this, our moment of great despair. Yea, admit this kind and decent woman into thy arms of thine heavenly area, up there. And Moab, he lay us upon the band of the Canaanites, and yea, though the Hindus speak of karma, I implore you: give her a break." "Clark..." "Honey, I'm not an ordained minister; I'm doing my best." - National Lampoon's Vacation

I didn't start out very eloquent as a Christian, and I ain't much better now. I love Jesus because He's able to work with what He's got.

(4) "Ahh, Jesus, I like him very much, but He no help with curveball" "Are you trying to say Jesus Christ can't hit a curveball?" - Major League

The spiritual journey can be bumpy sometimes. I actually jumped ship from the Church in my late teens and didn't come back for almost two decades. My second (and final) time entering the Church was less emotional and much more intellectual than the first time around. I love Jesus because He let's us ask the hard questions. And He has answers.

(5) "Hey Ray. Do you believe in God?" "Never met him." "Yeah, well I do. And I love Jesus's style, you know." – Ghostbusters

Once you're in, and you're open to it, it can be surprising where the Spirit leads you. Especially when it comes to opportunities to share the faith. Back in the late 90s, right before I started to figure out there was something to this whole organized religion thing, I had developed a rather nasty attitude towards the current crop of high schoolers. I thought they were lost, hopeless, spoiled, arrogant, filthy... well, you get the idea. Basically I couldn't stand to be anywhere within earshot of even one of them. A few years ago the head of religious education at my parish told me she wanted me to work with a group she had discerned I was perfect for. Guess which one? I love Jesus because He's smarter than I am.

Well, that's probably more than dadwithnoisykids was expecting. I would imagine he, along with anyone else who hung on till the end of this, may have a movie quote of their own in mind.

"At no point, in your rambling incoherent response were you even close to anything that could be considered a rational thought. Everyone in this room is now dumber for having listened to it. I award you no points and may God have mercy on your soul." - Billy Madison

Now I could just let it go at that. After all, that’s more than enough of my blabbering to expect any sane person to read. But, you know, it feels kind of like serving you leftovers. So maybe I can dig up one more quote that went unused last time and throw it in as bonus material. It’s the Why Do I Love Jesus meme, the Extended Cut.

(6)“You're problem is you think you're God.” “Well, I've got to model myself after someone.” – Manhattan

I’m in my fifth year of this blog now, with no plans of shutting my mouth any time soon. (Well, no plans of my own, I can’t vouch for anyone else.) There’s just too many bad movies and too much religion left to talk about. But I would imagine, just like in the real world, there have been times when I’ve come across like I know a lot more than I really do. But the truth is I’m still learning this stuff myself and struggling every day to put what I learn to practice. And if I’m to believe the teachings of the Church, there’s no way I’ll ever comprehend it all because God is so infinitely vast. But Jesus, I can know. I love Jesus because, through the simple acts of love and kindness He inspires me to perform for others, He lets me have a small glimpse into the infinite mystery that is God.

Now, the official rules of the meme are that those tagged will tag 5 other bloggers and  provide a link in the comments section here with their name so that others can read there five reasons. But looking around, I see that most of the bloggers I know have already been tagged. So if there’s anyone out there that hasn’t done this already and feels like taking a stab at it, please feel free to do so.