Tour de Pharmacy (2017)

I remember people talking about Tour de Pharmacy last Summer, saying how good it was but I never even bothered checking out what it was about. Then back in March, Steven from thevoid99 left a comment on one of my reviews and mentioned John Cena's hilarious performance in this so I checked it out. 

Tour de Pharmacy is a mockumentary that follows the (fictitious) 1982 Tour de France, the hornet's nest of moral depravity, and through the perspective of five riders --the Italian JuJu Peppi (Orlando Bloom), the "Nigerian" Marty Hass (Andy Samberg), the French Adrian Baton (Freddie Highmore), the African-American Slim Robinson (Daveed Diggs), and the Austrian Gustav Ditters (John Cena)-- it gives an inside look on doping in professional cycling.

Now, if you want to watch something serious, witty maybe, and boring, check out the Oscar winner Icarus; if you want to be entertained, watch this. You'll probably learn more about how doping in professional cycling works that you would watching Icarus anyway. Not only, you will also be saving more than an hour of your time. 

Anyway, this is a brilliant parody of the cycling world that constantly makes fun of the sport without being offensive --I'm not a fan of the sport, but there's Lance Armstrong poking fun at his own use of drugs and steroids, so I think it's safe to say it's not offensive. 

The slapstick approach to the topic allows the filmmakers to deliver plenty of gags, most of which are silly but very hilarious --I loved Armstrong's. There are a lot of crude jokes but they are quite memorable and always work. There's also some frontal nudity --it's HBO people-- but it only makes the film funnier. 

HBO

If it wasn't for the cast though, I don't think I would have enjoyed Tour de Pharmacy so much. Adam Samberg, Orlando Bloom, John Cena, Jeff Goldblum, Kevin Bacon, they all are amazing, even J.J. Abrahams playing himself, but my favourite was easily Dolph Lundgren. How did the man even manage to do that whole cheetah cheater scene with a straight face? I was cracking up. 

THE THREE (D) MUSKETEERS Take Form! Shooting This September!!

Remember that story about THE THREE MUSKETEERS coming to 3D screens with a more contemporary feel? Well I have new developments to share with you on the project...

Director Paul W.S. Anderson has been busy casting! Logan Lerman is in deep talks to play D'Artagnan, a young man who joins the King's guard after leaving his home.

Already cast are: Ray Stevenson (THE BOOK OF ELI), Luke Evans (CLASH OF THE TITANS) and Matthew Macfadyen (ROBIN HOOD) playing Porthos, Athos and Aramis respectively. Christoph Waltz (INGLOURIOUS BASTERDS) will play villain Cardinal Richelieu and Mads Mikkelsen (CASINO ROYALE) is set for Rochefort. Anderson's wife, Milla Jovovich is cast as Milady de Winter who is a former love of Athos and is described as being a 17th century Bond girl.

Apparently an offer is out to Orlando Bloom to play the Duke of Buckingham.

Anderson and Andrew Davies wrote the script. Summit is the distributor.

THE THREE MUSKETEERS is looking to begin lensing in September of this year. Not sure what to make of the project yet with that 'contemporary feel' label on it, but it must be good or they would not be able to negotiate such talent. The budget must be sky high for this with Bloom and company under consideration. More when I get it!