SHORT FEATURE: MAGIC MUMMY

Well, the latest iteration of The Mummy has hit the big screen, and the critics have been less than kind to say the least. As of this writing, it currently sits at 17% on Rotten Tomatoes. That means there is probably more critics who would prefer to catch Mummy Crotch Rot (you’re welcome, D&D fans) than there are who would want to sit through The Mummy again.

Me, I was a little less brutal in my own review over at Aleteia, but not by much. It’s just so… average. Even the supposed novelty of a female mummy has been done more than a few times before, as noted in this list over at Wicked Horror. But even that list seems to have overlooked this little nugget starring Tom & Jerry from 1933…

Not quite the Tom & Jerry you were expecting, huh? Yep, there was actually another duo who went by those names almost a decade before the celebrated cat and mouse showed up. They were basically Van Beuren's answer to Mutt & Jeff, and they had a decent run of 26 shorts over a three year period. Even so, nobody really remembers them anymore thanks to the more famous Tom & Jerry who came along later.

Oh well, not everyone gets to be the headliner in the history books, even if they have the right name. Take Mary in the New Testament, for example. No, not that Mary. No, not that Mary either. Or that one.

You see, there are actually six women (possibly seven) named Mary in the New Testament. There’s Mary, the mother of Jesus, of course. Then you have Mary of Magdala and Mary of Bethany, sister of Martha, both of whom are pretty well known. There’s also the two other Marys who were present at the crucifixion, Mary Salome, the mother of St. James the Great and St. John, and Mary Clopas, mother of St. James the Less and Joseph. Finally, there’s Mary, the mother of John Mark, who’s only mentioned two, possibly three times (there’s a Mary of Rome referenced in Romans who may or may not be the same woman, hence the possibility of seven Marys).

The thing is, though, all six of the Marys in the New Testament, even the little known ones, are recognized as Saints by the Church. Sure, Mary, the mother of John Mark, isn’t really the patron saint of anything and you’ll have a heck of a time finding a holy card with her face on it, but she’s a Saint just the same. And in the end, isn’t that the real goal? What does it matter if anybody here remembers your name or not? As long as it’s on the guest list at the pearly gates, you’ll be fine.