MovieBob's Insane Wii2 Theory

(posted to both blogs, because it's relevant)

Okay. By now, everyone is reasonably-certain that "Wii2" gets revealed at E3. And slightly-less-than-everyone is reasonably-certain that it's mystery-controller A.) isn't a Wii-Remote successor but rather can interface with one or something like one (knowing Nintendo this means peripheral backwards-compatibility, which they'd be INSANE not to do after selling everyone's mom a fortune in Wii Sports toolkits) and B.) incorporates a camera and mini-LCD touch screen into it's design - with most rumors suggesting the screen is roughly the size of an iPhone's, which would be HUGE for something that most are assuming is going to be "built-in" to a conventional dual-stick/buttons controller.

I've got a different theory...

I'll say upfront that I'm almost-certainly 100% off-base about this; largely because I have no talent or skillset for engineering. But on the off chance I'm right (or that it's not Nintendo's idea but not a bad one either...) here we go:

What if the touch-screen is an "everycontroller?"

Here's the idea: The screen will "fit" because it isn't there in-addition to action-buttons, but INSTEAD of action buttons. Basically, instead of dedicated action-buttons that every game has to be engineered for, the controller is just one or two analog sticks with NO dedicated action-buttons - instead, the touch-screen generates a set of "buttons" the arrangement and "form" of which are SPECIFIC to each individual game. Arcade-style buttons for a fighter, NES/SNES setup for a platformer, a PC-style stylus-oriented inventory menu for a sim (or an MMO?), something else for whole other genres I'm not thinking of or haven't been invented yet?

So, yeah. Crazy, probably not even close. But I don't think anyone could deny that this sounds EXACTLY like something Nintendo would do, right? Attention-getting, table-upturning, callous disregard for how 3rd party developers will feel about having to be controller-builders as well as game-designers and - this is the important part - it would LOOK ultra-revolutionary and cutting edge but can actually be built entirely out of decades-old technology their tech-teams are already well-versed in from the DS line. (Hmm... slightly-less insane theory: The controler will look like the bottom half of a 3DS, and a 3DS could be used in-place of one.)

So... uh-huh, that's kind of it: A controller that can turn into "any" controller - at least, that's how they'd sell it.

INTERMISSION: INCREDIBLE COOLNESS ALERT!

Just a quick note because I know some of you out there will be interested. A free audiobook of Lord of the World by Robert Hugh Benson just went live at Librivox. In his article CatholicAuthors.com, Joseph Pearce explains:

Hugh Benson was lauded in his own day as one of the leading figures in English literature, yet today he is almost completely forgotten outside Catholic circles and is sadly neglected even among Catholics. Few stars of the literary firmament, either before or since, have shone quite so brightly in their own time before being eclipsed quite so inexplicably in posterity. Almost a century after his conversion, Benson has become the unsung genius of the Catholic Literary Revival…

The world depicted in Lord of the World is one where creeping secularism and Godless humanism have triumphed over religion and traditional morality. It is a world where philosophical relativism has triumphed over objectivity; a world where, in the name of tolerance, religious doctrine is not tolerated. It is a world where euthanasia is practiced widely and religion hardly practiced at all. The lord of this nightmare world is a benign-looking politician intent on power in the name of "peace," and intent on the destruction of religion in the name of "truth." In such a world, only a small and shrinking Church stands resolutely against the demonic "Lord of the World."

Yeah, I know, sounds like today’s headlines, doesn’t it? But the creepy thing is that Lord of the World was written in 1908. It’s considered one of the first modern dystopias, a genre which is like meat and potatoes around these parts. I mean, come on, in the few short years this blog has been around, I’ve already reviewed the likes of THX-1138, The Blood Of Heroes, Class Of 1999, Cherry 2000, Warrior Of The Lost World, Conquest Of The Planet Of The Apes, The Apple, Surf Nazis Must Die, and of course… ZARDOZ! There’s no way I’m passing up a chance to listen to Lord Of The World.

Let me know if some of you listen to it (or have already read it), I’d love to hear your opinions.

CUTAWAYS: SPINAL TAP (DELETED SCENE)

In these days of on demand movie streaming, there’s not a lot of reason to actually buy DVDs anymore. That’s why extras like commentary tracks and behind the scenes documentaries have become such important marketing tools for film companies. And sometimes, the extras are more than worth the cost of the disc. Take for example the deleted scenes from Spinal Tap like this one…

Now why am I bringing up DVD extras. Well, it actually starts with The Happy Catholic. You see, for all my efforts at plugging her book, Julie D. has decided to reward me by… giving me some work to do.

Nah, it’s not really work. It’s only the Why Do I Love Jesus meme, which asks for those who are tagged to share 5 things they “love” about Jesus/or why they love Jesus. As fate would have it, this is actually a meme I got tagged with by dadwithnoisykids way back in the first year of this blog when only a handful of people had yet to find their way here. And in an appropriate coincidence, what with Julie being the queen of quotes and all, my answers came in the form of movie quotations. It went something like this.

As my close friends already know, and what those who visit here shouldn't be surprised by, is that I can rarely make it through a single sentence without a movie reference. So with that it mind, here are my 5 Things I Love About Jesus.

(1) "Have you found Jesus yet Gump?" "I didn't know I was supposed to be looking for him sir." - Forrest Gump

I was not raised a Christian (or anything else for that matter). I can count on my fingers the number of times I attended a church service during my pre-adolescent days. But once I finally went looking for God, imagine my surprise to find out that He had been there all along, close by, laying the groundwork for our first official face-to-face meeting. And he did the same thing for each and every member of my family in there own due time. I love Jesus because He's always there, whether we know it or not.

(2) “Dear Lord baby Jesus, we thank you so much for this bountiful harvest of Dominos, KFC, and the always delicious Taco Bell. I just want to take time to say thank you for my family. My two sons, Walker, and Texas Ranger, or TR as we call him. And of course my red hot smokin' wife Carley, who is a stone cold fox." - Talladega Nights

In middle school, when I finally became a Christian and started my journey into the Church, my beginners prayers were not what you would call eloquent. It went something like, "Thank you Lord, for everything." I still trot that old prayer out every now and then, although it has a much deeper meaning to me these days as I've come to understand that "everything" doesn't just include the good stuff I've been given. I love Jesus for teaching me to be thankful for everything.

(3) "O God, ease our suffering in this, our moment of great despair. Yea, admit this kind and decent woman into thy arms of thine heavenly area, up there. And Moab, he lay us upon the band of the Canaanites, and yea, though the Hindus speak of karma, I implore you: give her a break." "Clark..." "Honey, I'm not an ordained minister; I'm doing my best." - National Lampoon's Vacation

I didn't start out very eloquent as a Christian, and I ain't much better now. I love Jesus because He's able to work with what He's got.

(4) "Ahh, Jesus, I like him very much, but He no help with curveball" "Are you trying to say Jesus Christ can't hit a curveball?" - Major League

The spiritual journey can be bumpy sometimes. I actually jumped ship from the Church in my late teens and didn't come back for almost two decades. My second (and final) time entering the Church was less emotional and much more intellectual than the first time around. I love Jesus because He let's us ask the hard questions. And He has answers.

(5) "Hey Ray. Do you believe in God?" "Never met him." "Yeah, well I do. And I love Jesus's style, you know." – Ghostbusters

Once you're in, and you're open to it, it can be surprising where the Spirit leads you. Especially when it comes to opportunities to share the faith. Back in the late 90s, right before I started to figure out there was something to this whole organized religion thing, I had developed a rather nasty attitude towards the current crop of high schoolers. I thought they were lost, hopeless, spoiled, arrogant, filthy... well, you get the idea. Basically I couldn't stand to be anywhere within earshot of even one of them. A few years ago the head of religious education at my parish told me she wanted me to work with a group she had discerned I was perfect for. Guess which one? I love Jesus because He's smarter than I am.

Well, that's probably more than dadwithnoisykids was expecting. I would imagine he, along with anyone else who hung on till the end of this, may have a movie quote of their own in mind.

"At no point, in your rambling incoherent response were you even close to anything that could be considered a rational thought. Everyone in this room is now dumber for having listened to it. I award you no points and may God have mercy on your soul." - Billy Madison

Now I could just let it go at that. After all, that’s more than enough of my blabbering to expect any sane person to read. But, you know, it feels kind of like serving you leftovers. So maybe I can dig up one more quote that went unused last time and throw it in as bonus material. It’s the Why Do I Love Jesus meme, the Extended Cut.

(6)“You're problem is you think you're God.” “Well, I've got to model myself after someone.” – Manhattan

I’m in my fifth year of this blog now, with no plans of shutting my mouth any time soon. (Well, no plans of my own, I can’t vouch for anyone else.) There’s just too many bad movies and too much religion left to talk about. But I would imagine, just like in the real world, there have been times when I’ve come across like I know a lot more than I really do. But the truth is I’m still learning this stuff myself and struggling every day to put what I learn to practice. And if I’m to believe the teachings of the Church, there’s no way I’ll ever comprehend it all because God is so infinitely vast. But Jesus, I can know. I love Jesus because, through the simple acts of love and kindness He inspires me to perform for others, He lets me have a small glimpse into the infinite mystery that is God.

Now, the official rules of the meme are that those tagged will tag 5 other bloggers and  provide a link in the comments section here with their name so that others can read there five reasons. But looking around, I see that most of the bloggers I know have already been tagged. So if there’s anyone out there that hasn’t done this already and feels like taking a stab at it, please feel free to do so.

64th Festival de Cannes Short Film Lineup

The Short Film Competition, composed of previously unreleased works, has in the past led to the discovery of more than one auteur director who has gone on to achieve fame: Jane Campion or Xavier Giannoli, for instance, as well as Nuri Bilge Ceylan, Lynne Ramsay and Catalin Mitulescu, who are in the 2011 Official Selection, all drew notice when they made their debuts with a short film in the Cannes competition.

Completing the list of the Official Selection of the 64th Festival de Cannes, and composed this year of nine films from nine different countries, the 2011 competition brings together a great variety of cinematographic concepts, differing in style, genre, length and national origin.

The Selection

Badpakje 46 (Swimsuit 46), Wannes Destoop, Belgium, 15’
Bear, Nash Edgerton, Australia, 8’
Ce n’est Rien (It Is Nothing), Nicolas Roy, Canada, 14’
Cross (Cross-Country), Maryna Vroda, France and Ukraine, 14’
Ghost, Dahci Ma, Korea, 10’
Kjøttsår (Cold), Lisa Marie Gamlem, Norway, 11’
Meathead, Sam Holst, New Zealand, 10’
Paternal Womb, Megumi Tazaki, Japan, 15’
Soy Tan Feliz, Vladimir Durán, Argentina and Colombia, 14’

Jury (also jury to Cinéfondation competition)
President: Michel Gondry, Director, France
Corneliu Porumboiu, Director, Romania
Jessica Hausner, Director/producer, Austria
João Pedro Rodrigues, Director, Portugal
Juliet Gayet, Actress/producer, France

To check press release go here. To check info, synopsis, photos, etc. go here.

Please remember that in 2011, the Festival has created Cannes Court Métrage, which combines the Short Film Competition and the Short Film Corner, to foster the promotion of short films. Designed as a showcase for films and a meeting place for directors, producers and international buyers, Cannes Short Films will provide professionals with a complete panorama of young creative talent from around the world.

To round out the offering of short films and give the greatest possible number of emerging filmmakers access to the Festival de Cannes, the Short Film Corner was created in 2004 to offer producers and directors the opportunity to present their films and engage in meetings and initiatives that could be decisive for their future careers. Gathered in a single location in the heart of the Palais des Festivals, the Short Film Corner facilitates access to short films and offers an annual programme that can be tailored to individual needs, combining workshops and conferences. This year again, registrations from around the world reveal a growing interest in the short film format, with over 1,900 films registered, representing every continent. To check official site go here.

Watch some trailers, info, photos @MOC

Big Picture: "MovieBob's Junk Drawer"

43rd Quinzaine des Réalisateurs Lineup

A few minutes ago the last selection of Cannes 2011 was announced and this year the Directors’ Fortnight selection has some (in my opinion is very European or shall I say French?) geographic diversity while still being eclectic. There are eight first film -that still have to identify- and from all the films that still was hoping to see in Cannes this year only Ruben Östlund’s Play landed in this parallel section; so yes there are some inexcusable omissions in the complete Cannes selection but will talk about it in another post.

The Quinzaine selection includes some interesting films that surely will be controversial after their screening like for example Sion Sono’s Koi no Tsumi that’s a special screening and was described by Frédéric Boyer, Quinzaine Artistic director, as “kind of a sexual thriller”. The excellent news are that according to Boyer “this is a very good year for France, with some amazing films” as if true this year will also be another year with unbearable waiting time until I’m able to watch those “amazing films” and confirm my true love for French Cinema. Sigh.

These are the twenty-one (21) films in the main selection.

Opening Film: La Fée, Fiona Gordon, Domique Abel and Bruno Romy, France and Belgium
Closing Film: Les Géants, Bouli Lanners, Belgium, France and Luxembourg

(*)Après le sud, Jean-Jacques Jauffret, France
(*)Atmen (Breathing), Karl Markovics, Austria
Blue Bird, Gust Van den Berghe, Belgium
Busong (Palawan Fate), Auraeus Solito, Philippines
Chatrak (Mushrooms), Vimukthi Jayasundara, India and France
Code Blue, Urzula Antoniak, Netherlands and Denmark
(*)Corpo Celeste, Alice Rohrwacher, Italy, Switzerland, and France
(*)Eldfjall (Volcano), Rúnar Rúnarsson, Denmark and Iceland
(*)En Ville (Iris in Bloom), Bertrand Schefer and Valérie Mréjen, France
Impardonnables, André Téchiné, France
Jeanne Captive, Philippe Ramos, France
(*)La Fin du Silence (End of Silence), Roland Edzard, France
O Abismo Prateado, Karim Aïnouz, Brazil
Play, Ruben Östlund, Sweden, France and Denmark
Porfirio, Alejandro Landes, Colombia, Spain, Uruguay, Argentina and France
(*)Return, Liza Johnson, USA
Sur la Plance, Leila Kilani, Morocco, France and Germany
The Island, Kamen Kalev, Bulgaria and Sweden
(*)The Other Side of Sleep, Rebecca Daly, Netherlands, Hungary and Ireland

(*) First Film, competes for Camera d’Or

Special Screenings
Des Jeunes Gens Mödernes, Jérôme de Missolz, France and Belgium
El Velador, Natalia Almada, USA, Mexico and France
Koi no Tsumi (Guilty of Romance), Sion Sono, Japan
La Nuit elles dansent, Isabelle Lavigne and Stéphane Thibault, Canada

Also the selection includes fourteen (14) short films that you can check in the list here that also includes links with information, photos, etc for all films in the selection.

Yesterday was announced that the Carrosse d’Or this year will go to imprisoned Iranian filmmaker Jafar Panahi. There will be an empty chair symbolizing his absence and other activities including the screening of his film Offside.

Most interesting (because opens the festival to "normal" audiences) is La Quinzaine à la Bocca (the The Fortnight in the Bocca's district) a project that aims to try out an original dynamic in cultural activism aimed at an outlying quarter of Cannes that is part of a wider policy of democratization and access to culture. Linked with the Directors’ Fortnight, it aims to extend the reach of the event to the district of la Bocca.

This outreach project consists of screening films from the Directors’ Fortnight in two local cinemas (the Licorne and the Raimu) for the kinds of audiences that are often excluded from the festivities. So these audiences are not only given access to screenings but also an opportunity to meet Fortnight filmmakers and take part in screen education workshops. It is a matter of familiarizing such audiences with challenging cinematic forms, encouraging their appreciation of the films, and getting them more involved throughout the year in following the films.

Watch trailers @MOC

THINGS TO COME: I’M NOT JESUS MOMMY

Well, there seems to be quite a few somewhat Christian themed movies coming out this Summer. There’s Priest on May 13 (Which reminds me, have I pooped on Legion this month?) and Suing The Devil on August 26, but before you can see them, you’ll have to make it through this…

Hey, at least they’re not opening it on Good Friday.

Here’s the official synopsis: The film centers around a human cloning project which takes a turn for the worse with only one cloned pregnancy making it to term, a boy named David. Seven years after David's birth, wars, famine and natural disasters of every kind plague the Earth. As Kimberly struggles to survive, her biggest challenge is raising her son. Strange occurrences surrounding the young boy are only becoming worse and more mysterious. Roger, the head researcher of the cloning project returns to reveal that David was cloned from DNA taken from the Shroud of Turin... from the blood of Christ.

Dom dom dommmmm!

Well, this is hardly the first Jesus cloning movie to come down the pike. Revelation (2001) has the clone being produced from blood taken from the nails used in the crucifixion. Of course, they couldn’t just clone Jesus, they also had to splice his cells together with some DNA from a really eeevil billionaire, thereby creating the antichrist. Oh, and the baby is given to the Vatican who presents it to the world as the second coming. Stupid Catholics.

Oh well, we’ll have to wait and see how the Church fares in this one. Of course, it looks like they’re cribbing notes about the end times from the book of Revelation, so it’s more likely the movie will crap all over Left Behind reading evangelicals if it goes the anti-religious route. But maybe it’ll surprise me and not take that well worn path. And really, there could actually be a benefit from all of these books and movies about cloning Jesus. Maybe they’ll finally convince all of the atheists out there that cloning is a bad idea.

The Church, of course, is against cloning no matter where the cells come from. For one thing, as Sr. Terese Auer points out, “The actual cloning process of dividing the embryo so as to produce a new human being is immoral because it opposes the dignity both of human procreation and of the conjugal union.” Any technique, the Catechism explains, which dissociates the sexual act from the procreative act “is no longer an act by which two persons give themselves to one another, but one that "entrusts the life and identity of the embryo into the power of doctors and biologists and establishes the domination of technology over the origin and destiny of the human person."

And that kind of domination can only lead to trouble. The simple truth is, cloning would be just another step towards the commoditization of the human person. “A child is not something owed to one, but is a gift.” the Catechism reminds us. “The "supreme gift of marriage" is a human person. A child may not be considered a piece of property, an idea to which an alleged "right to a child" would lead. In this area, only the child possesses genuine rights: the right "to be the fruit of the specific act of the conjugal love of his parents," and "the right to be respected as a person from the moment of his conception."

It’d be great if I’m Not Jesus, Mommy managed to slip these issues into the narrative somehow, but I’m not holding my breath. At this point, I’d settle for just about any movie that didn’t depict Christians as raving lunatics. Well except for another one like Legion, which bypassed any depiction of Christians as nutballs and just made God into a homicidal maniac. I poop on Legion yet again.