Saturday, 13 August 2011

Depp's "Lone Ranger" Would've Been a WEREWOLF MOVIE

Hardworking (seriously, click through - dude WORKS for his traffic) film blogger Jeffrey Wells of "Hollywood Elsewhere" has done the digging and come upon what the supernatural/fantasy angle was that made Disney's Bruckheimer-produced, Johnny-Depp-As-Tonto "Lone Ranger" project so expensive that the Mouse House pulled the plug yesterday: Whereas "Pirates of The Carribbean" (which this was being nakedly modeled after) featured Depp and company as pirates fighting ghosts and/or sea-monsters; "Ranger" would've featured it's Cowboy/Indian buddy-heroes battling Old West WEREWOLVES - thus adding a new explanation to the Ranger's signature Silver Bullets.

I'll give those who had previously felt like this project could not possibly sound any MORE like an "Onion" parody of everything tired, bad and wrong about the present-day blockbuster scene to compose themselves...

You should really go to Wells' site and read the whole thing, but it's pretty incredible sounding: Tonto would've been the main character, a sort of Qui-Gon Jin to the Ranger's Young Obi-Wan; showing him how to deal with native-mythology Lycans with shamanistic magic - hillariously, it was apparently a big deal to Depp that the Native American spirituality surrounding said werewolves be taken "very seriously."

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